September 8, 2007 at 6:53 pm Leave a comment

Sayre, OK 

I find it much easier to think of myself negatively than positively, always have.  Some where along the line I took the Biblical statement to “not think more highly of myself” to mean I was to think poorly of myself and to accept anything short of perfection as failure.  Almost anything that doesn’t work I blame myself for and when I can’t fix something, even if it is out of my expertise or the fault of someone or something else, I still put the blame on me. It’s a curse. 

The last two years have been an immense effort to get free of that poison and old habits really die hard.  It is still a struggle to let go of the need to punish myself for something that happened 3 years ago and an even greater struggle to believe that I will ever live past the consequences of that failure.  Why are the curses easier to accept then blessings?  Why do I/we refuse to accept that Jesus came to bless us, never to curse us.  It has become, sadly, the province of the church that takes the name of Jesus, to be more about cursing than blessing. 

Henry Nouwen writes: It is an ongoing temptation to think of ourselves as living under a curse. The loss of a friend, an illness, an accident, a natural disaster, a war, or any failure can make us quickly think that we are no good and are being punished. This temptation to think of our lives as full of curses is even greater when all the media present us day after day with stories about human misery.Jesus came to bless us, not to curse us. But we must choose to receive that blessing and hand it on to others. Blessings and curses are always placed in front of us. We are free to choose. God says, Choose the blessings!

Did you know it was a choice?


Entry filed under: Belief, Culture, Faith, The Father, Thoughts.

Bless you! Monday morning meanderings. Vol.11 (Sunday night)

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