Friday Funny. Guest jokesters.
Here are a few “jokes” that were sent to me by others. If they are funny I will take credit for recognizing such quality humor, if they are lame or cute, blame the person who sent them in.
First, one from my father: A faucet, lettuce and a tomato were in a race. The faucet was running, the lettuce was ahead and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
From my friend Paul Zachary: A lady was walking past a pet store when a parrot said,
“Hey, lady! You’re really ugly!” The lady was furious and
continued on her way.
On the way home, she passed by the pet store again and the
parrot once more said “Hey, lady! You’re really ugly!” She
was incredibly upset now, so she went into the store and
said that she would sue the store and kill the bird. The
store manager apologized profusely and promised he would
make sure the parrot didn’t say it again.
The next day, she deliberately passed by the store to test
the parrot. “Hey, lady!” it said.
My friend Cody Custer gave this to me a few weeks ago before the democrats finished up trashing themselves but it still works:
There are less than eight months until the election,
an election that will decide the next President of the
United States. The person elected will be the
president of all Americans, not just the Democrats or
the Republicans. To show our solidarity as Americans,
let’s all get together and show each other our support
for the candidate of our choice. It’s time that we
all came together, Democrats and Republicans alike.
If you support the policies and character of John
McCain, please drive with your headlights on during
If you support Obama or Hillary, please drive with
your headlights off at night.
Here are three some kids told me last night.
Confusius say,”Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.”
Q: What do you call cheese that’s not yours?
A: Nacho cheese!
“Will you love me when I’m old and ugly?”
“Darling, of course I do.”
Don’t like these? Send me some good ones! Hope you all enjoy your weekend.